For now, in my dreams

I remember praying to God to not take my Great Grandmother away from us when she was in her final stage of life.  As a kid you don't, know much about death or to say goodbye to someone forever. I don't think I can quite comprehend that fact as an adult. The end of 2017 was rough, it was beyond anything that our family has ever faced. I lost my Grandfather and this loss will never really fade with time. Yes, the pain eases, you move on with life but that loss is always going to be there. You never forget them, how can you? , you hold on to the memories that they have left you till you see them again. On the day he passed away I remember waking up to my dog barking and praying to make him better like that little kid used to pray.  You really don't put a timeline on a person. As you grow up you know that life and death are all some process that happens in the universe. But you really don't believe it or accept the fact that one day you have to say goodbye to them.  I dreamt about my Grandpa last night. I was talking to someone about how much I miss him, then I saw him in the ICU and I saw him smiling at me like he always does. Whenever he appears in my dreams he smiles at me in a way saying that everything is okay. I am not afraid, I am happy that I get to see him in my dreams.

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