It's been a while since I could say this
I have cried in my trial rooms. I have looked at myself and asked why I looked like this. I have been on diet many times, all the while hating my body. I have body shamed myself and have been by others. In my memory, I have only been proud of my body twice, TWICE. The first time was when I took up swimming lessons. I loved swimming and loved being in the water. I was proud of my body then. The second time is now. I am comfortable in my own skin. I don't have that constant need to be small and to make myself fit into something that was not made for me to be in. I love my body and to be able to say that is a big thing. Today I went and tried on clothes. Some of the clothes were too small and some too big And what I noticed today is that I didn't cry when something didn't fit me and I didn't say hateful things to my body. Instead, I looked at myself and said that I was proud of myself and my body.